What do you get when you mix royals with racing?

Five days of horses, hats, and highnesses AKA Royal Ascot.

The pale pink boater was decorated with a string tassel, giving off serious high school graduation vibes.

Princess Eugenie with odd tassle on hat

The interior designer and TV personality showed up on day one of Royal Ascot 2024 in head-to-toe questionable choices.

Of course, we’d be remiss if we didn’t mention the head topper.

The pattern was gorgeous, the silhouette of the gown beautiful.

Anouska Lancaster in pink bling and big hat

Where it all went terribly wrong, however, was in the details.

The dress, a white frock with pale-hued flowers, was accented with contrasting black trim.

Kind of like what Laura Ingalls would have worn to church on Sunday with Pa. She was a high-end model who graced the covers of Cosmopolitan, Vogue, and Vanity Fair.

Victoria Brown in floral dress

And long before she became Rupert Murdoch’s ex-wife,Hall was married to Mick Jagger.

The sunnies, too, did nothing to brighten up the outfit.

Elizabeth Hurley

Day two of Royal Ascot 2024 brought Elizabeth Hurley to the Ascot Racecourse.

Cinderella Balthazar in ruffly blue prairie dress

This is the woman who famously wore a black Versace gown held together by safety pins and killed it.

She barely nicked it with her white lace dress, however, all because of some bad embellishments.

There isn’t even a cheeky safety pin holding one or two in place.

Jerry Hall in sedate dark blue dress

Elizabeth Hurley is floral-appliqued dress and basket hat